New Year upon us...

So 2007 is coming to a close. It wasn't a great year, it wasn't a bad year. It was one of those..JUST A YEAR. I did a lot of growing though. Finding myself more and more. Learning from mistakes I've made and watching others mistakes and using them as a "What not to do" in my own life. My kids are older...but will that ever change. I can't believe how big Camden is already. He amazes me everyday. And Tyler...he's getting so mature and grown up. A little to much for his own good, but still.

I've met new friends this year...and lost some too. All for the better though.

This year will be a trial. Ian leaves for Japan in April. I know we'll be fine and make it (he sometimes has doubts, but thats just his nature). But basically for all of 2008 I will once again become a single mother. With that brings good things and bad things. I get to do it my way...all the time. Yet I have no one to lean on, or back me up when the boys are getting out of hand. I get sad just thinking about it though. Him missing out on the boys for a year, and them missing time with him. I of course will be missing out too...but I can over come all this, it isn't my childhood.

Christmas was good this year. We didn't go over board with the boys. I only got them things they really really wanted. I didn't just buy a toy, because well, it was a toy and looked cool. Tyler got a DS Lite that he's been wanting. Camden got his Train set which he was stoked about. We went home Christmas day where both boys were spoiled rotten by my parents and Ian's parents. Ty and Cam got $20 each in quarters from Ian's mom. Tyler thought that was the coolest thing ever, even though it's burning a hole in his pocket already. lol.

We leave tomorrow for PA, to go visit my Poppy. I've never been so stressed out before in my life. I had planned a schedule..when we leave, drop off the dogs, get to PA, go out to dinner, etc. But thats been shot to hell. So now I'm frustrated and stressed..but whats new with that? It will be good to see my Pop though, he's never met Camden. And since this year was his first Christmas season all alone, I'm sure he'll be glad we're up, spending time with him.

Ian's Gammy died yesterday. She lived a LONG LONG life though. And I'm just so thankful we got to see her Thanksgiving week (when she was still her spunky little self). So we'll be attending her funeral the end of January.

Well, I need to go finish packing...and call a friend to vent.

later.

November is almost over...

And I am so freaking glad. I hate this months. Nothing good EVER happens in this month. And I'm glad December is right around the corner.

But then it's Christmas time. Stores are crowded..and I hate that too. I have no idea what to get my children this year. They aren't into anything really. And they also haven't asked for much. Which I should be thankful for...that they don't ask for stuff just to have it.




To You:
I miss you. I don't talk about you as much anymore, but I still do think about you. Almost on a daily basis. I can never forget you. Ian would never let me do that. It seems like yesterday, but reality has set in, and I know it has been years. Years since we last saw you. Heard your voice. He is still hurting, you know? He is still very much upset. I know he feels robbed. I hope one day, he'll beable to forgive you. I hope the anger and hurt will pass and the good memories and love had for you will remain always. Please, tell him it's ok. I hope everything is perfect where ever you are. We need to believe in that.

Love,
Me.

Hill Billy hay day!

Wow, I haven't been on this thing in a while. Not like many people read it anyway, and those who do, I talk to n a daily basis...but whatever.

So tomorrow Ian, me and the kids are packing up and heading to Richmond. It's the State Fair and I'm actually excited. We got a nice ass hotel room, and we're going to the fair with friends. Crappy for you yet AWESOME food, fun rides, things to do, people to see, money to spend. I can't wait.

This will be a first for the kids. I hope they have fun. I haven't been to a fair in uhhhh forever. And I can't wait.

So when I get back, which will be Sunday, I'm sure I will have A LOT to share!! Yayyy!

Here goes another year.

So Tyler started 2nd grade. I'm in shock. Second grade sounds so...well makes me sound OLD. He's been in school almost a full week now and I'm loving every second of it. School year is so easy on us. He goes to school, he enjoys his time away from home and I enjoy it too. He comes home missing me. I miss him. We do homework, he plays outside with friends. Then dinner time rolls around, bath time and then before you know it, it's bed time. The days blow by before I even know whats going on. And I just LOVE that.

Camden has been a pain in the arse lately. Getting mad, and when I say mad I mean MAD at me or Ian. Like staring us down, yelling at us. I'm just not used to it though, usually kids throw fits, cry and throw themselves around. Nope of course not my child. He just stares at you with this evil intense look in his eye and screams "YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU!" While he's pointing at you. The first time he did it, I couldn't help but bust up and laugh. He got even MORE mad at me. I mean the vein in his neck was popping out, while he screamed at me "I sit down!!!"

I'll somehow get a picture of his little stare down. We call it his "stink eye".

Ian will be home from work soon and then off to the ID place we go. Yayyyy military ID's. So I better go hop in the shower so I don't look like complete crap on my new card.

I'm gonna treat you right..

Wow. Today is going by S L O W. I lead a very boring life. Sucks.

So I don't have much to say. I just figured I should write something since I'm so bored and have NOTHING to do right now. I cleaned my entire house this morning, second day in a row. I'll be folding laundry tonight, what fun!!! Everyone clap for me now! I'm in the process of making dinner as I type. The kids are quiet and content watching a DVD. About time. And I'm jamming out to the music on my Myspace page. I seem to do that a lot.

I wrote the tattoo artist who did my swallows if he'd be willing to do my half sleeve. I sent him the picture and said I hate the head dress on the gypsy, and that I'd LOVE for him to change it up. I can't wait. I'm thinking the end of September I'll be getting my tattoo...I'm so excited. Then I'm getting my back covered up. THEN finally I should be done for awhile. But every time I say that I end up getting something else.

I've been telling everyone and their mother about these Green Tea Fat Burner pills. So far my friend Eric and his gf Rachel started them, Amy is going to buy them (as are my parents). These things are freaking awesome. I heart them with a passion. No weird crazy side effects. Just, not hungry..and loose weight.

My wrist that I broke gazillion years ago has been bugging me lately. I get this cramping feelings...and after typing or using it for awhile it starts to bug me...a lot. Last night it was really hurting. I had to motrin to try and help it. But it didn't.

Ok dinner is ready, must feed my starving children.

Later.

Friends are loving..

So I've just realized, girls who are best friends call each other some very rude, mean, very mean names. Like tonight I've been called by my best friends..

1. hooker
2. hookerface
3. whorebag
4. dildo
5. hussy
6. skank
7. fuckface

Now, I know this is all in good fun. I do it too. But for real how are girls supposed to have self esteem? Either that or I really a hookerface, whore bag with a dildo who acts like a hussy and skank at times.


Just kidding. I know I'm not.

Speakerphone is wonderful.

OK, I'm sitting here waiting for freaking Sprint to help me. I've decided I need text messaging. I didn't use it awhile back, but I'd realized sometimes it's just easier to text someone something rather than call them and end up talking forever. So my wait time right now is freaking 10-15 minutes. Urgh. Anyway. I love speakerphone, I very rarely use that either. But I'm using it, laid my phone down and I'm going about my business while listening to porn music playing on the other end. Porn music, elevator music SAME damn thing.

My MIL was in town for two days. She's awesome with the kids and I love having her down. But sometimes she lets them do a little TO MUCH. She gave Camden a crayon. He ran off with it...I didn't know and she wasn't thinking "two year old, crayon NOT a good combo"...but whatever. All of a sudden I hear her say "Oh NO! This is my fault. Oh man!". I walk over to where she is standing to see my 2 year old couch which was NOT cheap COVERED in like 5 different color crayon. I sent Camden up to his room to protect him...I thought I was going to put my foot up his rear end. He KNOWS this is a bad thing. He has drawn on the couch with pen before...only in a very small section though, and I've gotten it out. So I proceed to get a wash cloth and some water and wipe it off. Nope, that is NOT working. So I said "Wonder what else I can use a Mister Clean eraser for?" I was hoping it wouldn't stain the couch, but how bad could that be? Seriously it's already completely covered in 2 year old drawings. Well Mister Clean eraser came to the rescue AGAIN. Like always. Those things are a life saver. If you don't have one with small children in the house, well you're missing out.

This is his "hrmmm I wonder what trouble I can get myself into" look. Looks good on him huh?

I got my hair cut. When don't I get it cut? I don't understand why I can't seem to just leave my hair alone. I'm always cutting it, or dying it. But its cute. Shorter than what I thought it was going to be.

Hrm, still on hold with Sprint. They take forever.

It's supposed to rain here for like the next two weeks. Awesome! Just what I've been looking forward to! Not. I love rain, it's calming, cools things down, keeps things living. But seriously who likes running from store to store while running errands with two children in the pouring rain? Not me. But I guess this is what I have to look forward to.

I started taking this Green Tea fat burner pills uhhh probably 4 days ago. I weighted myself this morning. Holy Crap Batman, I've lost 4lbs already. Only 6-7lbs to go and I'm at pre-baby weight. Those 10 last FREAKING pounds are the hardest to loose. But I'm gonna do it.

Oh oh, they answered. Whoa. OK I'm done here.

Later.Publish Post